When the Bell Rings:

Tending the Ember for a New School Year

The yellow buses are rolling again, and with them come the sounds of laughter, new backpacks, sharpened pencils, and nervous energy. For many children, the return to school is a season of excitement and possibility. For others, it is also a reminder of struggles they carry silently—the weight of stress that follows them into the classroom.

As parents, caregivers, and community members, this is the moment to pause and reflect. What are our children carrying with them when they walk through those school doors?

The Science of Stress We Can’t Ignore

In The Deepest Well, Dr. Nadine Burke Harris shares an important truth:

“ACEs (Adverse Childhood Experiences) are handed down so reliably from generation to generation. Toxic stress is more consistently transmitted from parent to child than any genetic disease.”

That statement stopped me in my tracks. It means that what we don’t heal, we hand down. The stress, unresolved pain, and unspoken trauma of one generation often become the silent textbooks for the next.

Unlike homework or test prep, toxic stress isn’t something a child can simply set aside. It wires their nervous system, shapes their capacity to learn, and influences how they respond to everyday challenges.

A Call to Parents and Caregivers

As children return to school, we have a responsibility to tend not only to their physical needs—lunches packed, shoes tied, supplies ready—but also to their inner embers.

• Are we modeling healthy coping strategies when stress comes knocking?

• Are we creating safe spaces at home where children can process big feelings without fear of punishment or shame?

• Are we doing our own healing work, so that we don’t unintentionally pass down our unspoken wounds?

When we tend our own ember, we strengthen theirs. When we show resilience, we give them permission to grow resilient.

Practical Ways to Tend the Ember This Week

• Pause Before You React: Children absorb our tone and body language more than our words.

• Model Regulation: Show them what deep breaths, prayer, or journaling looks like in action.

• Stay Curious, Not Critical: Ask “What happened to you?” instead of “What’s wrong with you?”

• Speak Life: Encourage their efforts, not just their achievements.

Igniting Hope Together

The school year ahead holds unknowns—but one thing is certain: our children will rise higher when we rise with them. By tending our own embers, we break the cycle of stress and ignite a different inheritance: one of safety, healing, and hope.

As we say goodbye each morning, let’s remember: every child deserves not only an education but also an ember that has been nurtured, protected, and believed in.

✨ Your light will become their light. Let’s make this school year one where the embers don’t just flicker—they flourish.